June 19, 2007

It's not bad being a geek

To: All the members of my fraternity.


Gone are the days when you would wish to chop off the head of an arbit female who had just called you a geek.

I agree that you can't feel more peeved than when somebody calls you a geek. And that too when fantasizing about super models, letching at hot females, masturbating with your hand and not a pneumatic vacuum pump, manufacturing innovative slangs in chaste Hindi and counting the names of all Jenna Jameson flicks available on LAN is an integral part of your daily routine.

But I may not wince as strongly as I used to previously on being called a geek, because now there are 10 reasons why we make better lovers than the average uber cool metrosexual. Some of them being:
  • A geek is more likely to figure out how to customize toys and to design arousing environments for your avatars to play in than a non-geek. And that experience translates into a greater sensitivity to atmosphere and mood during sex -- beyond lighting a candle.
  • A technophobe mostly talks to you in person, but a geek is happy to be with you by texting your phone, flirting with you in a chat room, Skyping you, Twittering just in case you're on your vibrating couch (NSFW), sending funny cell-phone snapshots to your e-mail, playing online games, commenting on your blog, Digging articles that interest you, seducing you by instant message….
  • Geeks have seen all the porn you can imagine and then some, priming them to be open to your sexual peccadilloes. They are not only less likely to be shocked by your exotic requests -- they might not even realize that other people think your turn-ons are exotic. Conversely, your geek lover might be relieved that your wildest fantasy involves only two other people, five utensils and a trapeze.
  • Geeks haven't just seen a variety of positions, kinks and fetishes in blue movies. They know (or are) people who enjoy those things, so they don't dismiss entire categories of sexual interests as the sole province of a bunch of weirdos in San Francisco.
Ladies, next time you meet a geek, remind yourself of the divine powers that he possesses and ask him out!!

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